<img alt="Dois Policiais"src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.19123950960675051638886975742%2Fimage1.webp?alt=media&token=95aacfcf-e8bb-4df5-a290-2b06047fccb6">Morality has been a problem since the beginning of the philosophical tradition. Although it should be simple, the answers seem to hide or be relative when we find ourselves in a dilemma, which can be even more challenging to handle.This article explores a thought experiment to show the reader how morality demands personal values and how it is necessary to think things through carefully.Morality has played an essential role in the world. The creation of the concept rebuilt societies and was responsible for starting and ending wars. Yet, it is rather complicated to know what is the right thing to do in certain situations.To understand morality, one must realise that there is no such thing as a perfect guide to being morally right all the time. Russian author Leonid Andriev writes a short story on the topic.The story is “The conversion of the Devil”, and it tells the story of a Demon that doesn’t want to be bad anymore. However, evilness is rooted in the Demon, so he seeks the help of a priest. Shockingly, the priest finds the mission very difficult. He realizes that he can’t teach how to be good because the concept is often too far away from the practical matters of life.To understand these dilemmas, let’s do a thought experiment..<img alt="Silver Train"src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.19123950960675051638886975742%2Fimage2.webp?alt=media&token=5e0de111-6cae-4f81-adb2-a722b8ac5fe7">One day, a close friend of yours shows up at your house asking to tell a secret that you can’t share with anyone. They say that while driving, they hit someone, there was no time for slowing down, and the person died on the spot after being run over. However, your friend didn’t call the police and ran away from the scene. The next day, police officers appear at your house and start asking questions. Do you tell the truth leading your friend to incarceration, or do you lie, implying that you don’t know anything about the accident?In such a scenario, what is the right thing to do: Staying loyal to your friend and hide a murderer or break the promise and tell the truth? The answer is both, or neither or something else entirely different. Because the moral path frequently depends on an objective and how the problem relates to you.It is essential, however, to understand that our choices constantly have moral implications. It is rather difficult to follow up on all the nuances and dilemmas. Still, we have a more extensive understanding of our actions by thinking through the events and studying different views on the same topic, which is vital because sometimes immorality goes unnoticed.One good way of being morally guided is to create a personal value set, and in every decision when you’re dwelling on what to do, you pick from the value set and see how it relates to the actions at your disposal. Avoid doing anything that separates you from your most significant values.What would you have done in such a situation, and why?Discuss in the comments.

What is the “Right” Thing to do

<img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.52485430586477431631036480229%2F4ec66f95-1f32-48ae-b199-3932d03a2afd.webp?alt=media&token=e0c4b6a0-2fec-46ae-9505-ffff84cfb689" alt="File preview" width="700" height="466" /> People have always equated romantic relationships to monogamy. They consider love as a feeling that occurs between no more than two people. When a person argues to be in love with more than one person, we tend to brush these feelings off as a crush or an infatuation. But this is not always true. What if you love more than one person equally and passionately? If love is a choice, why can't we choose to love two people equally? Also, is loving your partners equally possible or even necessary? Love is a complicated emotion. A person typically loves more than one person in their lifetime, including their parents, siblings, pets, and friends among others. You are also attracted to more than one person at a time. But to understand whether you can love more than one person, the key is to distinguish love from attraction. When you are attracted to someone, your body goes through a series of chemical reactions that result in a powerful yet temporary sense of connection. Love is different because it takes time to develop and lasts longer. Upon understanding the difference between genuine love and attraction, we look at the idea of being in love with two people simultaneously. Falling in love with two people is not easy; it requires immense patience and investment. However, several experienced individuals have stated that it is certainly possible. You can fall in love with two people for entirely different reasons, and both these reasons could be equally valid. You fall in love with one person for the way you get adventurous with them, and you love another person for the way you feel safe around them. With both of them, your brain releases hormones that make you fall in love. Ultimately, love is a choice at some point. For the same reason, you will have to choose the next step by considering the various factors at play.&nbsp; Assume you are in a polyamorous relationship. It is commendable if one does manage an arrangement that allows a happy polyamorous relationship. But is it possible to love both/all partners equally? More importantly, is it necessary? Let us look at a polyamorous relationship where a person has two partners. The person can surely love both partners equally. If love is a choice, we can choose how to love our partners. But if you examine the emotions involved while falling in love, this statement may not hold because, well, emotions are uncontrollable.. But why is it necessary to love both partners equally? It isn't. Loving two people in an equal sense would mean offering the same things to both partners or doing everything twice. Doing this is not only impractical but also unnecessary. Equity is what matters in such relationships. Both the partners may need entirely different things from you.&nbsp; One partner may require a lot of alone time, while the other would love to spend most of their spare time with you. In such a case, spending more time with the latter does not mean you love them more, but you provide both the partners with what they need. One partner may want to trek with you, while the other prefers spending time indoors. Having a stay-cation with the former and a long trek with the latter would only result in two overwhelmed and annoyed partners. Thus, equity needs to be established in such relationships, and not equality. Every relationship is distinct and this is true even with polyamorous relationships. You will deal with two distinct people with various needs and preferences. Take the example of your parents; you loved them both equally, but they both had different expectations from you. Applying numbers to relationships may not be the wisest choice in polyamory. "Equity, not equality" is the way to go with these relationships to keep everyone happy.&nbsp;

The Why's and How's of Loving Two People Equally

<img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.7928762051668031631036323697%2FLOVE%20A%20CAREFUL%20CHOICE%20OR%20AN%20UNCONTROLLABLE%20EMOTION_1.webp?alt=media&token=9d319240-a5ea-4f70-bb9c-1222231fb7f0" alt="File preview" width="700" height="466" />Friedrich Nietzsche quoted once, "There is always madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." Love. Some call it a mere chemical reaction, while some prefer being more hearts-and-flowers with the definition. Others may even call it a daunting mission that sucks the life out of them. But I am not here to define love; as it is not as simple as people try to make it. What intrigued me was this question- is love a conscious choice or an uncontrollable feeling? Post hours of research and intense contemplation, here's what I discovered.Falling in love is easy; it happens almost so inadvertently that it requires little effort. New relationships are rosy and joyful, and people constantly think about their partners and wish to spend time with them. However, this "honeymoon phase" fades, leaving people questioning their relationships and chemistry. That is when the question of love being a choice or a feeling surfaces.&nbsp;First, let us look at love as a feeling. After all, you "feel" something from within during those first few interactions. The butterflies in your stomach, the daydreaming, and that rush when you see them- those are all beautiful feelings and seldom conscious choices. But feelings usually fade, and this stands true for relationships. Such sentiments are unreliable and transient, and their retreat causes doubts and distress. These feelings also leave people stuck in toxic relationships and prevent them from quitting damaging bonds. Ask any couple who has been together for a few decades, and they will confirm that it isn't just "feelings" that kept them together. <img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.7928762051668031631036323697%2FLOVE%20A%20CAREFUL%20CHOICE%20OR%20AN%20UNCONTROLLABLE%20EMOTION_2.webp?alt=media&token=056cec42-2e49-460f-8dc4-c0932224b59f" alt="File preview" width="701" height="468" />Then why do people believe that love is a choice? People choose to continue loving their partners. They are determined to look beyond or accept their partner's flaws. They make up their minds to love their better half every day, regardless of their feelings. But seeing love as a choice isn't always ideal. Humans need their choices and decisions to be right all the time. They think that their partners should also "choose" to be perfect, as everything is ultimately a choice. However, with matters of the heart, things aren't that simple. It is almost as unrealistic as telling someone to "chill" and them chilling instantly.&nbsp;Seeing love as merely a choice also invalidates the struggles of those stuck in toxic or abusive relationships. People look at an abusive relationship and question the victim for not ending things, as it is ultimately their choice. Individuals in such relationships are often trapped in a web of manipulation, lies, and fear. They also suffer from low self-esteem and loneliness. In some cultures, they may maintain such relationships because of the involvement of families. An influential psychological phenomenon to be considered in such relationships is intermittent reinforcement. A reward is offered by the abuser whenever the individual performs a desired activity, but only sometimes. The desire for this reward makes the person desperately repeat these activities, hoping to get rewarded with love, attention, or whatever they want. This action-reward system gets so hard-wired into the brain that people get addicted to the relationship, leaving them stuck in the circle of abuse. In such cases, it is rarely about love, let alone it being a feeling or a choice.&nbsp;So what exactly is love? Love is a skill. One that everyone can learn, and some can outclass. Being considerate, patient, kind, mindful, and supportive simultaneously requires expertise. We cannot grasp these effortlessly, like any other skill. It takes years of learning and experience to master this skill. This skill is crucial not only to continue loving someone but also to know when to stop loving someone. Knowing when to leave a relationship is an important element to this skill, one that could save you pain and trauma. When you perfect this art, you can better understand people and their circumstances to make smarter decisions. This understanding helps one differentiate a good relationship or feeling from a toxic one. Love is both a feeling and a choice at some point, but it has to be a skill for it to live long and be fruitful. Thus, the goal should be to gain expertise in this skill, not categorize it as a choice or feeling.

Love: A Careful Choice or an Uncontrollable Emotion?

<img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.84000070748493851631036143223%2FCAN%20BUYING%20THINGS%20REALLY%20MAKE%20YOU%20HAPPY_1.webp?alt=media&token=5bafadf1-5db3-4bc5-b2f6-2e6a7c364b21" alt="File preview" width="701" height="408" />Try this brief experiment the next time you watch TV. Look at the advertisements when they appear, and notice how almost every ad tries to convince you that buying and using those products would make you happier instantly. Be it the ad for your regular toothpaste, a bar of candy, or even a high-end SUV, it all revolves around making consumers happy. Of course, this is not a very surprising or new fact; capitalism has almost always revolved around selling the idea of happiness, and we cannot blame these brands. Humans have, after all, been obsessed with the concept of happiness since time immemorial. But here is the real question- does buying these products truly make you happy?&nbsp;It is a widespread notion that being materialistic and buying things will not make one happy, and even if it did, it would only be temporary. However, studies have proven that experiences make you more content than purchasing goods. Renowned psychologists Leaf Van Boven and Thomas Gilovich established in 2010 that they suffer from buyer's remorse when people buy things. During or after purchasing, individuals gravitate towards comparing their possessions to those of others. People get used to their products and lose their enthusiasm eventually, only to move on to whatever else makes them happy. The study participants also claimed that experiences made them feel content, as their effects last longer and are harder to compare to those of others. Think about it; even when you buy things, it is often the entire experience of possession that makes you feel elated rather than simply owning the object.&nbsp;<img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.84000070748493851631036143223%2FCAN%20BUYING%20THINGS%20REALLY%20MAKE%20YOU%20HAPPY_2.webp?alt=media&token=65db495c-a3b2-4add-862b-3a6a9539070d" alt="File preview" width="700" height="466" />But hold on before the minimalist in you exclaims, "money can't buy happiness". A recent contrasting study has proven that buying things that match your personality would indeed make you happy. Let me elaborate with a personal example. Few things excite me more than buying new clothes, whereas I care little about electronic gadgets. A tech geek would be thrilled to invest in a new gadget, but buying new clothes means nothing to him. We would not just enjoy owning these products but would also enjoy the experience of purchasing them.&nbsp;So which of these studies is, in fact, correct? Well, we won't know for sure, but there is a middle-ground for those who wish to have both objects and experiences. A study published in 2014 explained that "experiential purchases'' or products that offer consumers an experience were just as good as gaining contentment from life experiences. These could also be products that help you express yourself freely or facilitate creativity. I enjoy buying items such as paints, sketchbooks, and tools that help me create art. But to me, these count as both experiences and purchases. In conclusion, whether you prefer buying products over enjoying experiences is contingent on your personality. Every individual values a particular type of happiness more than others, and there is no right or wrong in either of these.&nbsp;References-<ol> <li> Stigmatizing Materialism: On Stereotypes and Impressions of Materialistic and Experiential Pursuits, Leaf Van Boven, Margaret C. Campbell, Thomas Gilovich, First Published April 2, 2010</li> <li> Money Buys Happiness When Spending Fits Our Personality, Sandra C. Matz, Joe J. Gladstone, and David Stillwell, Department of Psychology, University of Cambridge, and Cambridge Judge Business School, University of Cambridge</li> <li> To have in order to do: Exploring the effects of consuming experiential products on well-being, Darwin A. Guevarra, Ryan T. Howell, Department of Psychology, University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, MI, USA b Department of Psychology, San Francisco State University, San Francisco, CA, USA</li></ol>

Can Buying Things Really Make You Happy?

<img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.392732045901529551628072884675%2FTOXIC%20POSITIVITY_ShilpaSivadas_1.webp?alt=media&token=85238d46-123a-40e8-9e40-2d1d9ec879d5" alt="" width="764" height="509" />The wise Mark Twain once said, "Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough&rdquo;. We all say that until we've had a wild night of too much whiskey to drink and wake up the next day with a vile hangover, only to realize that it&nbsp;really&nbsp;was&nbsp;too much&nbsp;whiskey. I like to compare positivity to Mark Twain's whiskey. They both sound like things that could never go wrong, but they can go wrong in so many ways in actuality.&nbsp;It is a common misconception that being constantly and excessively positive is excellent for your mental health. However, the truth is far from it, and people don't always realize that it is crucial to experience the complete range of emotions, both positive and negative. Positive thinking is immensely helpful in coping with stress, and it can enhance resilience, but dismissing all negative emotions and overgeneralizing positivity is where it gets toxic. Toxic positivity or forced happiness is the expectation of being zestful and happy, even in the face of adversities. It comes with myriad repercussions; repressing emotions can cause anxiety, depression, sleeplessness, and a general deterioration of mental health. Your unsightly optimism can lead to failures that could have been avoided.&nbsp;Most importantly, negative emotions make you human. As humans, it is nearly impossible to feel no negative emotions, and these serve as coping mechanisms in various life events. No fight in life comes with only positive vibes, and your obsession with positivity could stop you from working towards social justice due to negative emotions such as anger and fear. That is not what we woke folks want now, right?So how does one distinguish good positivity from toxic positivity? Here are some ways to recognize that your positivity has turned toxic:1) You avoid and run away from negative emotions - If you feel awkward whenever you feel sad, angry, scared, or jealous, and if you prefer to simply replace them with positive thoughts instead of "feeling it out", you need to watch out. In the wise words of my therapist, avoidance works, but only temporarily. Imagine shoving a ton of things into a tiny drawer to clean up a messy room. You can overstuff the drawer and shut it tight, but it will only be a while before the drawer bursts open and makes a bigger mess than before. Similarly, these emotions may go away temporarily through avoidance, but they can come back stronger or may even last longer.&nbsp;2) You try hard to find positives in every bad situation - Every cloud may not have a silver lining. Still, if you are persistent in finding one for the sake of staying optimistic, you're getting close to toxic positivity. Everybody goes through tough times, and it is only realistic to say that you cannot always find immediate positives.&nbsp;3) You guilt yourself and others for feeling negative emotions - Everyone has heard phrases like "just move on" or "don't be such a baby" or "be a man" (toxic masculinity alert!). These phrases not only dismiss negative emotions but also lack empathy and compassion. Humans often bond over negative emotions, experiences, and trauma and avoiding these can stop you from connecting with others.&nbsp;4) Overgeneralizing "it is what it is" - People often simplify the idea of stoicism and accept everything without feeling the right emotions for it. Maybe what you are going through is immutable, but that does not mean you don't acknowledge the emotions that come with it. Genuine acceptance can only come after you go through the tsunami of emotions caused by the trauma.&nbsp;5) Frequently minimizing your and other people's experiences - Saying things like "it could be a lot worse" or offering overly positive affirmations at a time of crisis is a telltale sign of toxic positivity. Everyone goes through unique experiences in life, and you cannot measure these emotions on a scale.<img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.392732045901529551628072884675%2FTOXIC%20POSITIVITY_ShilpaSivadas_2.webp?alt=media&token=7093ff6c-567c-4276-9e5e-d4f173804cde" alt="" width="765" height="510" />It may almost sound like a lot of our supposedly positive habits are toxic, right? Does that make you a toxic person? Not if you are willing to acknowledge and change these habits. The key to changing these is simple - do not chase the emotions away. Make it a habit to feel every emotion, even the negative ones. Try to get through the feelings rather than getting over them. It is easier said than done, but it is worth the effort. You will notice that your negative emotions are short-lived, and you will feel liberated and recharged, just like you do after a good cry. When you genuinely experience every emotion, you will have a whole new perspective of real, unforced, and unfettered positivity.&nbsp;

Toxic Positivity – The Bad Side of “Being Too Positive”

<img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.147844135799393151637142959690%2Fimage1.webp?alt=media&token=fd470750-291c-46b7-938c-843b1ab8de52" alt="File preview" width="700" height="466" /> We meet ourselves in different situations every day while dealing with society. And one day, we start to feel anxious about our environment, realizing that something is not right. And we ask ourselves a question: &ldquo;What was I like before society told me what I should be? To what extent have I stayed authentic? What does it mean to be authentic?&rdquo; Authenticity in existential philosophy is a degree to which an individual&#39;s actions align with his beliefs, drives, or desires, despite the external pressure of society. Masses set standards for what is in their parameter, good or evil. In living an authentic life, one must rise above the opinion of the masses to overcome the boundaries of conventional morality. In that manner, we determine what is good and what is not. <img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.147844135799393151637142959690%2Fimage2.webp?alt=media&token=2288f1f1-5ce6-4df8-b3b6-910c1a3a867b" alt="File preview" width="700" height="466" /> Nietzsche talks about the Master Morality and the Slave Morality. The slave morality is about those that blindly follow the masses and are willing to confine to the majority. On the other hand, we have the master morality which for those few individuals who follow their own path. &ldquo;No one can build you the bridge on which you, and only you, must cross the river of life.&rdquo; Masters are those who stay authentic, but how does one acquire such a thing? We must accept ourselves as a totality, which contains both the good and the bad. As Nietzsche states: &ldquo;You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.&rdquo; To stay authentic, we must consider every quality we have and shape it into something beautiful. In Nietzschean terminology, authenticity is beyond good and evil because all characteristics are part of you. If you are not a good sportsman but can play piano, you should focus on that and nourish it. You are the only sculptor of your own true self. Look at yourself as an artist who creates his own values and meaning. &ldquo;Our religion, moral teachings, and philosophy are manifestations of human decay. The movement against it is an art.&rdquo;&nbsp;- Nietzsche The process of creation starts from scratch. To create new values, that are authentic, we must first destroy the old values which were only interpretations of opinions of the majority. Becoming who you are is a long process, which requires revaluation of all values. To reevaluate all the values is to escape the herd mentality. Instead of obeying and being commanded, we should be the ones who decide and command themselves. We should become conquerors to the extent that we do not become an authority over others. Genuine authenticity lies in power over oneself. In the process of personal development, we can observe that many people will change their attitude towards us. It is essential to realize that everyone is different and no one has a right to mock us for our decisions, provided that there are no universal instructions on how to live. In Nietzsche&acute;s words: &ldquo;And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.&rdquo; <img src="https://firebasestorage.googleapis.com/v0/b/creed-community.appspot.com/o/images%2F0.147844135799393151637142959690%2Fimage3.webp?alt=media&token=252aaa75-caf7-495b-aa7a-e4f850e291c0" alt="File preview" width="700" height="466" /> People are, for the most part, scared of that, which exceeds social norms. It was clearly observable in Nietzsche&#39;s Thus Spoke Zarathustra or Camus&acute; The Stranger. People feared and disliked both of the main characters from the books for their unusualness. If you can rise above all of these judgments, to reevaluate the values, to model yourself in your image, only then you are truly ready to become yourself. You must accept all of your differences, be kind to yourself, and at the same time, you must know how to forgive yourself. On the way to achieving an authentic life, a little selfishness is not at all detrimental. At the end of the day, you are the only person you will be with for the rest of your life. The authentic self is beyond good or evil. Adopting master morality lies within us. It is only up to you to navigate unexplored seas. Only we can change our inauthentic and average life into something extraordinary. The feeling that we do not belong is inevitable, and it happens to each of us at least once in a lifetime. It may be caused by different views, opinions or thoughts. Yet you are being you. You are being authentic.

What do think about this idea?

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